All posts by denikyjay

My name is Adenike Babajamu. I am an organisational transformation expert and a content creator. I am passionate about human capital development. My focus in life is to help humanity see the light that shines at the end of every dark tunnel. I believe that everything is possible to him that believes it is. I am also assured that starting small in life is God’s divine nature but remaining small is an aberration and definitely not in line with God’s Plan for mankind. I am God-centric, a lover of God who makes Him the centre of everything.


One of my most demanding occupations is the job of being a Nigerian. I have heard people talk about it and I have rationalized it as another joke. But honestly, just being a Nigerian is work; trust me it is a career that we (Nigerians) have to live with.

It doesn’t matter who or where you are, being a Nigerian demands responsibility; lots of explanation about failed leadership, infrastructure gaps, corruption, tribal and ethnic differences, terrorism, insecurity etc.

Have you ever wondered why we have so many religious charlatans in Nigeria? It is because we have to and as a matter of importance pray about everything. For instance, to go to your village, in addition to praying for protection against witches and wizards, you must raise prayers on the following:
• safety on the roads,
• security from kidnappers & terrorists
• Prayer against flat tires from bad road
• harassment from Police, Road safety officials, VIO etc.
• Fuel scarcity or adequacy: That your fuel does not run out or that the 10 liters in your tank does not dry out before you arrive the village etc…

Things that ordinarily should be logical and straightforward have taken Nigerians to mountains to pray. For instance seeking admission to Federal universities, paying house rents, children’s school fees and medical treatment for simple illness like malaria may demand a fast or spiritual consultation.

Everyday is loaded with its own kind of fear; loss of jobs, road accidents, ritual killing, yahoo yahoo and a host of others. You are afraid to walk to your neighbour’s house for lack of trust and insecurity. Everyone is a potential suspect of being evil and dangerous.

The truth is that whether home or abroad, every Nigerian is a story teller or better still an unsolicited advocator of gross inefficiency. At home, here in Nigeria, the story is endless. Once you enter a place and say “eku Nigeria” or “how far”. You may not leave the place in the next 5 hours.

Abroad, when you introduce yourself as a Nigerian, the questions will begin to roll in. Questions on why our leaders are so corrupt or our education system is poor. Either way, Nigerians are busy people; either justifying or assailing this great nation.

This last few months have been most traumatic for almost everyone in this career especially with the cash crunch and the pain of transacting business at the remote rural areas of the country not to talk of the 2023 election brouhaha . Now that the presidential election is over, can we at least have cash to transact businesses?

Now don’t get me wrong, I love cashless policy and I have been a propagator of it. But being coerced into it as done in the last weeks is detrimental to the economy. With over 40% of the Nigerian population in rural areas and most of them financially excluded, one can only imagine how horrible life had been. It is unfortunate that like in all cases of a fight between two elephants, the grass suffers. so also the masses have suffered greatly in this past weeks.

Let us come back to the issue of being a Nigerian as a lifetime occupation. As traumatic as it seems and the JAPA syndrome notwithstanding one thing stands out; being Nigerians is what we all have to defend as we do not have any other option. Read about the JAPA here: Relocating to Canada, US or UK are only temporary measures. No nation is big enough to host the largest black nation in the world. Besides, a lizard in Nigeria can only grow to become a big fat lizard in the developed nation not an alligator.

Honestly, I love Nigeria and seriously I don’t have a relocation plan. I am truly proud to be a Nigerian. Maybe not so proud when I have to defend some of the senseless things that happen here. But proud nonetheless.

The resilience of Nigerians is second to none in the world. It is no wonder that in spite of the differences that divide us we are still kind of glued together. In spite of the so many threats of breakaway, we still end up being bedfellows. The more we try, the more we are stuck together by intermarriages, faith and I guess divine forces.

I am hopeful that nothing lasts forever and soon this narrative will change and Nigeria will be better. Then, and only then will being a Nigerian may not be such a crazy job after all.

The JAPA Generation: A generation to watch

So many things have been said about the Nigeria Japa syndrome; a sudden move by Nigerians to migrate to other countries particularly the USA, UK and Canada for greener pastures and better opportunities. In the definition of Favor Babajamu in her vlog

Japa means: depart or flee your country and never return.

That Nigeria is losing her strong, healthy, promising professionals and upcoming youth to the migration craze to other nations is no longer news. Statistics show that over 30,000 Nigerians relocated to the United Kingdom alone in the year 2022. This figure does not include all their dependents. How ironic that one Nigerian student in the UK could arrive with 5 dependents.

My focus on the Japa move is however not on the immediate losses to our Nation as this has become very obvious in the dearth of professionals in the health sector, education and several others. My interest is in the future generation of Nigerian migrants and their offspring in their new countries. I make bold to say this generation is indeed one to watch out for.

Today many Nigerians are doing great exploits in foreign land. The likes of Noel Ifeanyi Alumona, who won the 2022 AFS Award for Young Global Citizens, and became the first African to win the prize since its inception in 1914 will continue to increase in the wake of the rise of Nigerian elite settlers abroad.

Just imagine. What would become the future of these young Nigerians migrating with their parents to the developing world? Given the background of the struggling, determined parents and would be parents, it is reassuring and comforting to state without reservations that these countries are in for a shock as Nigerians “may” gradually take over their economy.

Now don’t get me wrong, it will not happen in two years maybe not even in ten years but in less than three decades, the story of this migration will bounce back on the receiving nations. There will be great transference of wealth, power and position to Nigerians in these nations. The beneficiaries may not be the parents who migrated and may have to do three jobs to survive but rather their children. Imagine a Nigerian (child of an immigrant) becoming the president of the United States of America or Prime Minister in the UK (the likes of Kemi Badenoch)The sad thing however may be that when this happens, many of them would have changed nationality and that is when we will know the value of what we have lost as a nation. I guess by then they may be invited back as “expatriates”.

To really assimilate this truth, I wish to draw our attention to the slave trade and several migration patterns in the past. I don’t want to make this write-up a long one, rather I like it to be thought provoking and forward looking beyond the perceived immediate consequences of the Japa Syndrome.

Just think for a moment about these;

  1. What is the average group of Nigerians migrating? You can classify them as middle aged, average class, vibrant youth, educated, skilled, highly determined and diligent workers etc. Many with their whole families, young children and so many others that would be born in the new countries
  2. The high level of desperation to leave is also worrisome. I have seen seemingly successful people dispose of their properties, life time investments in exchange for a PR in Canada.
  3. Another shocking fact is that family that may be considered below average are as desperate with many of them resulting into borrowing and pulling funds from friends and relatives.
  4. The recent changes in the migration policies of Canada and UK has become so dynamic and suspiciously flexible such that one cannot but trace the changes to the upsurge of immigrants from African countries. They dangle carrot before unsuspicious migrants. Now what are the implication of these policies?

The Japa conversation is only just beginning. I would rather be positive in my thoughtMigration does not automatically equal better life. It comes at a cost and my advice for anyone who still wishes to join the race is to ensure that due diligence is done before leaving. You must have a strategy that has several options in place. This is because a lizard in Nigeria can only grow to be a fat lizard in the USA but certainly not an alligator.


He crowns the year with His goodness and His paths drop fatness (Psalm 65:11)

Doing the same things the same way almost always yield the same result. Folks, year 2022 is creeping, I mean running gradually out and here we all are. It is time to begin to take stock and take a peep into year 2023. I like the popular saying; it’s not over until it is or until you win. but sometimes it is not over until we REFOCUS, change the direction of our gaze, deemphasize our emphasis and readjust our binoculars on something different. To me this has remained my end of year password for years now.

Remember we entered the year with quite a huge list of expectations and many of us had documented Personal Development Plans (PDPS). Read about PDPs here ;

It is easy to tick and smile at the things we have been opportune to achieve from our list but what happened to those that just stood firm like mount Everest and Kilimanjaro and refused to shift base? They just won’t bulge in spite of several strategies, calculation and consultations. We even went spiritual; fasting, praying and binding and the mountain still says “I am still here o”

So what next? The password is REFOCUS; shift your gaze on something different, divert your energy elsewhere. For once let yourself go, live in the euphoria of the season. Remember, hope is for the living and no mountain is bigger than a man with hope. Indeed a living dog is better than a dead lion. (Ecclesiastes 9:4). Undermine the mountain, common(ize) it and make it feel insignificant. Guys, it’s time to shift focus. Haba e don do self! Let’s change focus in these last weeks of the year as they roll by.

Join me in this crazy excitement of living the times and not being stereotyped by this achievement mentality. Guys I’m shifting focus. I am so so excited. it’s almost contagious. My best season is here at last and that is just enough for me.

You want to join me? Well this is it? Lined up annually are activities that help me refocus, change my priorities and prepare me for the following year. I am sure you will find similar activities around your environment irrespective of where you are on the globe. And guess what? In the midst of these activities in the past, my miracles often happen the mountains just began to shift unnoticed and indeed God crowns the year with His goodness and bountiful harvests as I focus on Him in appreciation and adoration for still being here on planet earth. He didn’t bring us here this far to abandon us.
So guys set your calendar, roll out your dancing shoes, give yourself a break, take that vacation, let’s celebrate our victory of life over death, triumph over defeat, safety in the midst of chaos, safety on our roads, healings and the many deliverances from several insecurity challenges of our continent. Yes maybe we indeed lost a few things and very precious people, or some dreams were thwarted and roads shut I’d say like my mentor, God is the reason why everything is not lost and something is still remaining.

To God alone be all the glory forever and ever and ever.

PS: Below are a few of the annual activities that occupies me and gets me prepared for the new year. Be my guests or look for similar ones around you but by all means dont be caught sulking.

Welcome to your most beautiful end of the year experience

Of the Hills and Valleys

I am sure we have heard it said that the race of life is not a sprint but a marathon with bends and turns. Sometimes it is smooth and at others not so smooth. Sometimes it rains and at other times it trickles. In our selfishness and inconsiderate attitude, a little challenge here or there often throws us overboard but nonetheless it doesn’t change the fact that God remains constant.

I find Ebunoluwa submission on her page a summary of what our attitude should be in this month. Afterall, God has not brought us this far from January to abandon us in November.

Read except from her story below:

“I woke up to a rejection mail yesterday. I found this rejection particularly hurtful because I had expended time and already began training for the project. In that downtime, it felt like the sum total of all the good in October waned in comparison to this one rejection.

However, God stopped me right in my tracks and I soon realized how immensely ungrateful I’d be, in such state, failing to see God’s faithfulness despite the rejection. Often times, we find it easy to recount and dwell on our disappointments and expectations that didn’t materialize. At those times, we equally forget that the same God is the God of both the hills and valleys. God is no less greater in my failures than He is in my wins.

So today, I set out with a grateful heart and confidence in the God who works all things together for good according to His purpose. And, I took a picture as well to serve as a memorial and reference for when my big break finally comes through.”

How I changed my lifestyle to change my life.

I have read so much weight loss stories and never thought I would be writing one.
Many of those stories are best imagined than real. I had also tried several strategies to reduce my almost 100kg (220 lb)weight. I had tried fasting, diets, herbal teas, Gym etc. Some actually worked but within a couple of months I was back to my old weight and sometimes would have gained additional kgs.

Of course I was not always “fat” even though I felt fat all my life. Now when I look at my pre-wedding pictures I realized that my weight problem also had to do with my mindset. It became worse after I had my first child. I had different sizes of clothes in my wardrobe; some for when I lost weight and some when I gained weight. There are some clothes that I could only wear in February after the 21 days annual fasting of my church. How funny?

So I grew up battling weight problem. In my time it was difficult to get those cute dresses that would fit my size. So shopping for readymade designs was quite frustrating. Comments like “we don’t have this in your size” or “Please try the Plus corner of the mall” were common. Sometimes, I ended up with maternity gowns (smiles). This however is not the gist today.

This is my story.

Between the Covid 19 year and 2021 something happened that triggered a need to change my life style. I call it the Covid 19 year because that was the year I experienced the greatest morbidity and inactivity. Work from home became a norm and my life generally became sedentary. I realized I was frequenting the hospital for funny ailments like neck pain, headaches, instability in blood pressure etc. All the tests I ran said all was well except for high level cholesterol. I was placed on Atorvastatin for 3 months. I hated drugs even though the doctor said it was harmless. For me the only harmless thing was food. A week into the treatment, I returned to the hospital with complaints about side effects of the drug. My Doctor (God bless him) said I had no choice unless I was ready to begin rigorous exercise to lose the bad level cholesterol in my system.

I left the hospital sad but determined to do something about the excess fat that was threatening my life. So I continued with the treatment but also began a process to change my lifestyle. I realized that losing weight and controlling what I ate was no longer an option. It’s either that or a life of statins and other regulators. So I sat down and advised my body and spirit.

Prior to this time I ate all I desired to eat and (I am ashamed to admit) in large portions. I like….. No! I loved fries like a young girl would love her crush. So if it was fried plantain, fried yam (Yorubas call it dundu) akara, samosa, French fries, pizza, all kinds of pastries, potato chips, I was in. Anything fried or baked just appealed to me. I had no portion control. I also loved chocolates, ice creams, candies and the likes.

Please note that I am neither a dietician nor a nutritionist and I really don’t know much about the theories but I know that the only way to get fat and have excess calories is firstly by what we eat, how we eat it and when we eat it. That is the honest truth from my personal experience. Almost everyone battling with weight problem who is sincere will agree that he or she also has a food problem.

After my visit to the doctor and his verdict, I examined my life style and took the following decisions.

  1. Reduce fries to the barest minimum (I didn’t take any fries in the first three months of this decision)
  2. Consistent work-out. I do a minimum of 3-4 km daily except Saturdays and Sundays. I volunteer to clean in my church on Saturdays and that also burn out some calories.
  3. Opted for non-cholesterol oil to make my stew using very little quantity. As a typical Yoruba woman that like to see plenty oil in her stew, I reduced the quantity of cooking oil to about 20% of what I previously used. Today, you will never see oil on my stew and the truth is the stew is still sweet.
  4. No more late night meals (I try to eat my last meal between 5-6pm with very few exceptions on fasting days)
  5. Invested in air fryer and air-fried my fish, plantain and chicken instead of deep oil frying.
  6. Replaced fried plantain and potatoes with boiled plantain and potatoes
  7. Eliminated red meats (only very rarely but none in the first 3 months)
  8. Reduce carbohydrate (Less of rice, bread, yam)
  9. Reduce portion of food and substitute with more water
  10. Increase fruit intake
  11. Increase vegetable intake
  12. Avoid pastries (only take occasionally, like once in two or three weeks but in small portion)
  13. Because I like sweet things, I avoid food that needs sugar like oats, cornflakes etc. I replaced them with my green tea, natural fruits.
  14. Eliminated dairy products like milk, eggs, butter and only take once in a very long while
  15. For my tea, I opted for green tea and would squeeze into it fresh oranges to sweeten it. It tastes good once its served hot.
  16. Made my juice naturally
  17. For snacks (I love snacking in between meals) I introduced fruits and peanuts. Rather than buy processed bottled or packaged groundnut, I buy the unpeeled roasted or boiled one and the process of peeling as I eat soon reduced my appetite and the quantity I consumed.
  18. I reduced my salt intake. Now I cook my white rice without salt and even yam. I never knew I could, but guys it’s actually sweet once your sauce is well seasoned.
  19. I also read labels to check the composition of what I eat.
  20. I use more of the stairs and do enjoy activity that involves walking

All of these and many more that I cannot remember now soon became a lifestyle. I have done them consistently for about a year and now I am so used to them. Today, when I try to do otherwise like eat too much of sweet things or pastries I do not only feel uncomfortable but also feel sick. I have waited to go a whole year before sharing this experience and I am indeed happy to do so especially having being encouraged by my daughter who I now wear the same size with.

It is also important to mention that I am not obliged not to eat anything. So I try not to tell people to abstain completely from any particular food. Rather portion control and moderation is the key. Also exercise is not negotiable. Walking out should be a daily routine. No matter how busy you are, you must create time and be consistent no matter how little. It’s not enough to do 20 km in a day and nothing until another two weeks.

For people who work late as I used to and sometimes do, you must make conscious effort to have an early dinner. Most often the late food do not digest and remain in our belly and are later converted to belly fats. You must therefore change your lifestyle of late meals.

The good thing about changing your lifestyle to change your life is that it is not a quick fix. You don’t just drop the weight in a month. It is a consistent and gradual process. My greatest motivation was myself, my health and the fact that I do not want to live a life of daily drugs intake when there is an option.

Now what are the outcome of my decision.

  1. I lost 13kg in the first 3 months. The exciting thing about this is that I didn’t even know I was losing weight in the process until I noticed that I didn’t fit into my clothes again and was being asked by people if I was Ok. There was no pressure of deprivation that I used to feel in past weight loss exercises.
  2. I felt lighter. I could stoop without getting tired. I could walk up the stairs without breathing heavily.
  3. My health improved tremendously; my blood pressure became stable without regulation, all the earlier discomforts and ailments left on their own. I didn’t even know when they did.
  4. I ended up not completing the statin tabs and do not need them or any other medication anymore.
  5. I sleep better. No more turns and frequent waking up at night.

The gradual weight loss ensures proportional weight loss across your body mass. Every part in your body adjust well. When I started, I was on a UK size 18-20. Today I wear 14-16. I even wear my daughter’s dress. I recalled how I took a picture and sent it to her and she screamed “Mummy where are your thighs?”It was that dramatic.

Am I there? No not yet but I thank God for the grace released to me to get to where I am. I never in my wildest imagination thought this was possible. I have had people stop me on the way to ask what happened to me? I have had comments like “you look good but this weight loss is too much”. Well guys that’s the new me. I am not sick. I only changed my lifestyle to change my life from going down.

Final Notes

Reading through this one would think it was so easy. But not so. Changing your life styles involves great discipline, your ability to say No to wrong desires, and be consistent in your approach. It is not a one year treat. It is a lifelong journey. So even when you fail, you must learn to get up and go again. Gradually you are bound to lose the wrong appetites and a reversal of desires become the norm.

Were there challenges?

Yes there were many challenges:
There were days I was really tempted to eat some pastries, fried meat. They just look so appealing sometimes. But I kept reminding myself of the consequences.

There were mornings I feel reluctant and lazy for a work-out but somehow I knew I had to keep going. I cannot return to where I was coming from. I must never go back to a size 20.

There were nights that I would really love to eat late and would actually go to the fridge like many people do but would opt for water and go to sleep.
There were days I look at the clothes in my wardrobe and can’t find a fitting one to wear. I have had to pack them in bags to my tailor to adjust. So the truth is I need money for a complete makeover or change of wardrobe at least.
There are also lots of explanations to friends and family who cannot understand why you must drop some excess weight. I hope now they know.

Did I ever fail?

Yes there were days I failed and would sneak in a snicker or another chocolate bar or a large portion of cake. I would console myself that once in a while was not bad. But sometimes once in a while goes into twice or more and then I begin to feel guilty as if I was caught stealing. But I always bring myself back to the prize and that prize is healthy living.

Somehow I wish I had done this earlier in life. It would have afforded me the opportunity to wear those lovely dresses that I saw on some of my very slim friends. For someone however, it is never too late to live healthy. Maybe someday soon I will share my experience with an expert for improvement and also help people who are battling with the weight challenge.

My final word is that I find out from this experience that there is no quick fix rule to weight loss. I also discovered; that you are fat does not automatically mean you are unhealthy as long as you watch what you eat. Similarly that you are slim does not automatically equals low cholesterol. You need to do a test as you may be slim and yet have the wrong cholesterol composition.

Don’t be like me who once thought the only harmless thing was food whereas some of the food we eat are poisons. Be wiser take a step. Change your life style, change your life.

Thank You, Faith Iyinoluwa for encouraging me to do this. I hope it helps someone.

PS: I have chosen not share personal pictures because I am a private person but those who know me have my testimony.


This is not just a rhyme but this September has indeed been a September to remember. A season I will not forget in a while. So it is with nostalgia that I bid September 2022 goodbye. Adieu to a great month.

Life’s challenges are sometimes like trying to chew up an elephant. It’s so enormous that starting is always a problem. But somehow we start anyhow. I learnt early from a great man; W.F Kumuyi that rich people save before they spend while the poor will spend before saving. Ultimately poor people never get to save anything because, if you are from a country like Nigeria where you are your own “government”, you will not have anything left to save. So I always put aside some savings when I have a project to carry out. However from experience I have realized that even your savings cannot be enough. There is a Master Builder.

For [of course] every house is built and furnished by someone, but the Builder of all things and the Furnisher [of the entire equipment of all things] is God
(Hebrew 3:4 AMPC)

Once upon a time I had wanted to change my car to what we call “tear leather”a Nigeria parlance for brand new automobile instead of the fairly used Tokunbo cars we are used to. I spent over two years saving for it but I never could save 50% of what was required. As the savings grew, so also did the unforeseen challenges of life reared up from time to time until my 50% became 20% and my dream of owning a tear leather car was almost a mirage. However, just when I was about to give up, the Master Builder of all things showed up and arranged a brand new (tear leather) car for me (story for another day). He showed up, made a “mess” of my savings and replaced it with His favor. This was over a decade ago.

So this September, He showed up again and upturned a near embarrassing situation in a most miraculous way. He made a “mess” of all my efforts and replaced it with His favor. He had said to me earlier in the year that Five Loaves two fishes was more than enough…. That became my best song since the year evolved and the truth is that it became a reality in September.

So guys, I have said all of these to remind someone that no matter how tough or rough the road is, keep going because the Master Builder is at work and His time remains the best time. Play your part of building and furnishing and watch Him place the icing on the cake of your life. Remember that the darkest night always usher in a bright new morning.

If you survived Covid 19, Monkeypox, violence and insecurity of different dimensions, climate changes and many other challenges too numerous to list at a time like this, then be assured it’s not over until you win.

This October shall be yours to remember and many more.

Goodbye September.
Welcome October, another month to remember.

Guilty or not Guilty?

Staying on a diet requires discipline, self control and a great determination to fight the alluring temptations of sweet foods that keep staring at you.

Sometimes you break the rules and it feels like you have committed a grievous offense almost equal to robbery against yourself. This was just how I felt yesterday.

I woke up with a craving for yoghurt and fruit parfait. I fought it with shawarma and told myself it was just for one day. And then I was offered fried rice with a big chunk of tempting fried chicken for lunch. I couldn’t resist any longer

Guys, I fell… broke all the rules. By night I felt really guilty. I wished I had resisted just a little more. Unfortunately I added more unhealthy calories and felt so guilty.

This is the summary of stuffs we do to ourselves and often end up doing things we really wouldn’t want done.

Discipline and self control are virtues of great men. It works in all cases such as maintaining a diet, keeping fit, exercises, work ethics, dealing with habits and addictions. It takes a lot of determination to deal with unhealthy habits and ADDICTION IS WARFARE: HOW TO WIN

Not to worry though, life gives us opportunity to start again each day. So if you failed like me yesterday, and felt guilty about it, it’s the reason God made today and offers another opportunity to try again.

Failing in its self is not failure until you completely give up and refuse to try again.


Tribute to my colleague, my friend and my dearest sister

Bola Olumoh Alaya: Poised with grace

How do you ever learn to say a final goodbye to a loved one?
How is the best way to show how hurt you are?
Sometimes you groan, you cry, you weep tremble and moans.
Yet, everything seems inadequate to express your grief and pain.
The pain is stuck in your chest … almost choking, yet not going away

Often if you are like me, your bowels move like a case of diarrhea
And your frequency to the restroom to excrete and pee increases
You are tensed, your heart beats faster and then when the night comes
All you feel is emptiness and a deep wish to have spent more time together

All of these, I and many who loved you have felt in the last two days
You were my senior in the college, Queen Elizabeth Secondary School
Though I hardly knew you then
Then our path crossed again when you joined Afribank Nig Plc
Where we became colleagues and were divinely connected.

You were a seasoned banker, unassuming and very thorough
As a marketer and Head of Retail, you gave it all it took
Even though I knew the stress on your tender self
You kept at it, pursuing diligently and never giving up
I remember with nostalgia the many MPRs
The backlash when targets are not met

You were my office gist partner, when you returned from marketing
We would gist and talk about how tasking the target was
But we kept at it
Your simplicity and humility humbled me
You never looked down on anyone
Despite your privileged background, you had room for everyone.
You were a giver to the core and often empathize with junior colleagues

We had a great time as colleagues and it wasn’t long before you became my friend
We shared concerns together and your wisdom was unmatched
Then one day you dropped the bombshell,
You were leaving the bank.
Nothing we said mattered, your mind was made up.
I remember your exact word “okele gbigbe pelu Alafia…..”
You chose peace and serenity and opted for government work
With very much less pay.

It was a blow to me and others who loved you.
Why would you leave a better paying job?
I watched with mixed feelings as you exited the bank in style,
Like all you do, resplendently and gloriously you resigned to join the Kwara State Government
It was a courageous move, one we all thought was too much a sacrifice
But you thought differently; your reasons were apt and your humility made it acceptable
You left a vacuum in my heart and in the bank
For me, it began my own desire to exit as well

My Woman Crush Everyday (WCE),
You had class and you wore it gracefully
You were stylish, elegant, beautiful inside and out
You turned out often at our ceremonies,
Children graduation, birthdays, marriages, burials etc
You would attend with Nike Olumoh, your loving sister-in-love
Who is currently crushed by your exit.

My dear friend, my sister from anothether mother
So much to say about you, but words are just inadequate right now
My heart bleed, my thoughts about you cant go away
As I drove down to town for Janaza Prayer in your honour today,
All I kept whispering to myself was:
She’s Gone, She’s Gone, Just like that. Opari niyen
I still whisper it to myself even now; She’s Gone, Oti tan Just like that.

So today you were finally laid to rest
And like all you do, it was glorious and with great grandeur
Your gentle soul in life and in death finally back to your maker

Even in death you remain noble, graceful and stylish
The world stood still, Kwara stood still today as you were laid to rest
The greats and the small, the haves and the have-nots
The many lives you touched and impacted
Your colleagues, family and friends
Stood in awe, though with so much pain
Yet thanking God on your behalf
For a life of impact, influence and affluence

Adieu Sister, Adieu friend,
Adieu to a loving and caring mother, sister, wife and friends of many
Those we love, live endlessly in our hearts
Even though our hearts bleed now, we are comforted by your sweet memories
And the wonderful times we shared together
May all you left behind particularly your immediate family be truly comforted
And as for you:
May Almighty Allah accept your return
And grant you a most peaceful Aljanah (Amin)

Adieu my dearest friend, I love you greatly and wished I said it more often.


HOW NOT TO BE 95, @ 55.

“I can’t be growing old… Haba! I am only 55 not 95″

Did you ever get up from your couch in the sitting room, walked up into your bedroom to get an item and then suddenly find yourself lost in the center of your bedroom trying hard to remember what you actually came to pick?

Or maybe you are in the habit of searching everywhere for your reading glasses and after a lot of effort, you returned to pick the spare pair of glasses and as you mount it on your face you realized that you had your glasses on all the while?

Then the shocking one, you are in the bathroom, getting ready for a bath but you went out to answer a call or pick a new bath gel. You returned to the bathroom a few minutes later and as you picked your toothbrush, you are wondering if you hadn’t brush your teeth earlier.

Another shocking one is this;  you have just taken your doctor’s prescription, and then you suddenly felt that you had taken the drugs earlier and you are actually trying hard to remember if you did. Now, this one happened to me just yesterday. I had a doctor’s prescription to be taken once daily to clear an allergy. I usually take it with my meal, so yesterday after my lunch, I took the drug but just after I swallowed it, my sixth sense said to me “Omo (child) you have taken this drug before”.  I counted what was left and it was true. Wow, I said to myself “I can’t be growing old… Haba! I am only 55 not 95 and I am very young at heart”.

By the way, I was just 55 years “young” a few days ago, 17th June to be precise. And I remember my daughter saying; Mom, you are growing old and asking how I felt. I told her I am a spirit  and spirit do not age but only gets renewed and matured. How convenient to turn spiritual. Well, so at the Communion table yesterday night, I asked God to reverse my aging process by the Blood. I do need it.

Irrespective of your age, I bet you have experienced some of these or similar occurrence at one point in your life or maybe not? But I guess that as one grows older, you actually tend to forget very simple things. Please don’t tell me it’s amnesia otherwise over 50% of Nigerians are sick  especially our politicians and government officials who am sure are expert at forgetting stuff.  

So I asked Google what to do so as not to forget very simple things. Trust me I was not the only one talking to Google on this. The result from Google is a research for anyone interested. It ranges from simple things as having a to do list, setting alarms, repeating stuff to yourself, using calendar to schedule activities, exercising regularly, writing stuff down, keeping notepads around the house or office, good nutrition etc.  I agree that all of these plus prayers and maybe medical help will help one not to forget stuff. I however recommend in addition to these reading.

Our brain is like a storehouse and somehow not doing anything with it will get it rusted and old and that is when we actually grow old. So I am going to read some more and I encourage us all to do so. I also like those simply simple stuff that I am told will help the brain to be health. They are my favorites.

While, I know that my Jergens Age defying lotion ( I love Jergens) can only help my body and not my brain, here is a list of some stuff, I am told could help;

  1. Crossword puzzles,
  2. Dance some more
  3. Listening  to music,
  4. Learn a new skill
  5. S*x (relationship thing legitimately)
  6. Reduce sugar
  7. Video games
  8. Less TV
  9. Exercise
  10. Learn some new skill
  11. Swimming
  12. Singing

I intend to try a few of those stuff except number 5 (don’t tell my husband). In any case, I agree that age is set in our minds if you are determined you can be a Kardashian at 80 (just kidding). You are built actually to be better.


As an employee. Don’t wait until you are shown the door or pressured to exit. If it is not your own, then it’s not your own. The secret is always to start from where you are, doing what you know to do best and turning your passion to your job. Follow my Friday journal and let’s journey to freedom together. 👉👉👉